Spanish diplomat mas nervioso que el hopo de una chiva...

Caramba con los Spanish diplomats, estan mas nervioso que el hopo de una chiva.

You are telling me, what a spectacle in Namibia where El Griffo gatecrashed and started harassing a El Otro Linares, el de los liberals.

My dear I think we must be doing something right when the Spanish are getting so nervous, what do you opinate?

Pues that you are right, como siempre. And judging by the articles appearing in the press abroad, los del Foreign Office must be feeling ashamed.

No hay quien pueda con nosotros, somos pequeños pero mas grande que ellos.

Meanwhile, Ia gran noticia is not que se va El Duro when he had to, pero lo que dicen in the corridors of The Convent.

Don't tell me que you are in contact con Ia monja espantosa?

I cannot reveal my sources, como dicen los periodistas, pero los rumores son si van a mandar aI que era Governator of the Falklands.

You mean a Sir Rex? I mean, he must be older now than any of the trees in the Convent garden, my dear.

What I say es que mientras no nos manden al ex de Hong Kong, que nos quiere tanto y no saben lo que hacer con el en eI EU...

Bueno, bueno, let's see what surprise they spring us in the Spring. Never a dull moment.

Y si hacen un deal, sera el Deputy Dawg, el blando de Blunt, who will have to raise the Spanish flag?

Que sera, sera, como dice el song. Pero cualquiera es el guapo que se le ocurre hizar un Spanish flag in our Gibraltar

Mira Ia que hay arma con Io de poner los Gibraltar flags in military areas.

Claro. Y los de Andalusia dicen que this Andalusian territory so they will also come over with their flag.

Oh dear, esto es comico were it not so serious.

Meanwhile, el chiquillo Conservativo metio en un buen lio porque he is perceived to be too friendly con Patajamon.

Mira que eI Patajamon, who says he is Labour, tan metido con los Conservatives!

Bueno, hija, eso son cosas de pueblo, if you ask me. I didn't see him on National day did you?

Ni lo se ni me importa. What I know es que Ia pase de peach pie de melon, y aI que no le guste our National Day que se quede elsewhere.

Y ahora otro gran dia for the referendum - que bien hasta los del Spanish ministration estan worried, con que viva nuestra Pepa y si le pesa a Miss Palace pues too bad.

Eso, que siga leyendo los papeles for another 300 years. Say goodbye to me.

And to me. Ta, ta. 

Gibraltar viewpoint 

by David Eade

GOOD GRIEF IT’S GRIFFO

One of the highlights for me of the recent Earth Summit in Johannesburg was the antics of Namibia’s President Sam Nujoma. He led an unbridled attack on Britain’s Pony Blair as he gave his whole-hearted support to his close ally Zimbabwe’s Robert Mugabe. The speech Nujoma gave at the summit and his later interviews with the BBC were a joy to behold. Here is another African leader who is one mud hut short of a full kraal.

You’ll not be surprised to learn that according to the Namibian Society for Human Rights between 1999 and 2001 it noted a fivefold increase in ‘infractions upon civil rights and political rights. Included in the catalogue are “virulent attacks on human rights defenders, the judiciary, die church, whites, Europeans, foreigners, women and sexual minorities as well as the banning of certain media’.

Given that Nujoma is barking mad and add to that his country’s record in human rights you might he surprised to learn that Namibia was recently chosen as the venue for a meeting of the Commonwealth Parliamentary Association. On further reflection I doubt whether you, my wise reader, will be surprised by that in the least either!

However the madness seems to be spreading. Mr. Perez Griffo is the Spanish Ambassador to Namibia. Diplomats from all nations, virtually without exception, abide by a very strong code of protocol and decorum. Alas poor Señor Griffo seems to have lost the plot when he discovered that there was a Gibraltarian representative at the meeting. He’d already been un-nerved when earlier in the week the PA had voiced its support for Gibraltar’s right for self-determination, which caused alarm bells to ring in Madrid.

Now the Gibraltarian representative at the Namibian fleeting was Steven Linares, a member of the Opposition. According to a GSLP/Liberal Opposition statement ‘the Spanish ambassador in Namibia, Mr. Perez Griffo, provoked a major incident at a reception hosted by the Namibian Minister for Trade and Industry for delegates attending the meeting of the Commonwealth Parliamentary Association.

“Mr. Perez Griffo gate crashed the dinner and proceeded to verbally harass Opposition Member Steven Linares. After the dinner, Mr. Griffo who had been hovering around the room throughout the dinner, enquired from the British delegation where the Gibraltar delegate was. When this was pointed out, he approached and sat on an empty chair next to Steven Linares. He then proceeded to criticize Gibraltar and the Chief Minister Peter Caruana, accusing him of doing a disservice to Gibraltar.

“In reply, Steven Linares defended the Chief Minister and defended the Gibraltar position. The fact that the Spanish Ambassador gatecrashed the dinner in order to talk to one of the delegates has caused an uproar in the meeting of the CPA. The British delegates there have described this as totally unacceptable. This morning in the final plenary session, on the topic of “Global Security” one of the delegates from Malta has raised the issue. He said that it was disgraceful that someone could simply walk into a private dinner for Commonwealth Parliamentarians and intimidate a delegate and a parliamentarian from Gibraltar. He added that this opened the door to all sorts of lobby groups and officials bursting in on different CPA activities in different countries. These comments were made in front of the whole plenary session, which means that the entire conference has got to know what happened.

‘The profile of Gibraltar in the conference has therefore been raised considerably as a result of the activities of the Spanish Ambassador. Steven Linares has been advised to lodge a formal complaint with the Executive Committee of the Commonwealth Parliamentary Association and will do so in writing.”

I don’t know what was the most traumatic moment for Steven Linares being ear bashed by Griffo or having to defend his political foe Peter Caruana. None the less Spain has been made to look ridiculous and worse has lost face before an international gathering of distinguished parliamentarians. All of which does not bode well for Griffo. He’ll probably soon receive a new posting, Baghdad, were his diplomatic skills at gate crashing meetings will not go amiss!

David Eade writes in the Costa del Sol and Costa Blanca news. 

The Armando LaGrande Column

What balderdash from this blarney boy...

Every paper was impressed by the National Day rally - except an Irish one. Oh dear, the Irish had to be the odd-nut-out.

What's the name of this paper - the Sunday Post or the Sunday Business post, what's in a name? It does not detract from the rubbish written about us.

First, we are told that when we speak English we do so with an accent. May I ask the writer what kind of Irish accent does he have when he himself speaks English? Besides, if he detests everything English, how come he writes in English and not in his native Irish lingo?

Bingo! That's one on him. And I could recite a rosary of junk from this scribbler. Because we like babies, that somehow makes us Spanish. Does he not like babies?

Whatever we do in our own kind of way, that makes us Spanish according to his unique Irish logic! It might not make us 'English' but no one here professes to be so.

This guy has forgotten when Ireland was part of the UK - that did not make them Irish English!

How can a self-respecting paper publish so much balderdash? Tell you why, it's all to do with our having joint sovereignty foisted on us. They would love that. Because if we get what we do not want, then Dublin can use it as a stepping stone to Northern Ireland, hoping the twits that currently make up the UK Government will also offer it to them - that being one way of getting half of the North.

If that is the kind of rubbish they fertilise down Dublin way, who can be surprised that those up North don't want to have anything to do with them?

Tell us another Irish joke, blarney boy...


How many categories of Gibraltarians are there?

Can you believe it when I say that there might be some people in Gibraltar who do not want to vote in the referendum? That being so, they should give their vote to those Gibraltarians abroad who are not being allowed to vote, and would love to!

Don't ask me who is right or wrong about them voting or not voting - the Gibraltarians abroad, I mean -but what makes it worse for comparison purposes is that other non-Gibraltarians are being allowed to vote.

It could be that once you register as a Gibraltarian that's what you are for life. Don't ask me, ask Dennis Reyes who is the Referendum Administrator.

It could well be, and I said could well be, that we need new categories of Gibraltarians apart from Resident Registered Gibraltarians.

Apart from Non-resident Registered Gibraltarians, we could have Gibraltarians Who Left Gibraltar During the War and Remember Where Gibraltar Is. (Eligible to vote).

We could also have Gibraltarians Abroad Who Think Gibraltar is in Jamaica. (Not eligible to vote).

We could have Gibraltarians in Nearby Spain Who Think they Are Spanish. (Not eligible to vote, as you are not allowed to think that).

What about Gibraltarians Who Are Expats (like English expats!) Who are Abroad But Think They are At Home. (That's a tricky one).

Then, there are Gibraltarians Who Retain a Connection With Gibraltar. In this category, there would be a need to establish the precise nature of the connection. Is it a telephone connection? A family connection? A Tell-Me-When-You-Are-in-London connection and I will show you the sights?

Temporary-Abroad Gibraltarians might be a favourite one. Here, there would be a need to describe what is temporary, because there might be some who might think that living in Fulham since the evacuation is a temporary pastime.

I mean, and I don't mean it, we should postpone the referendum until we draw up a list of several hundred categories of Gibraltarians. Let it be said: The more Gibraltarians there are, the longer it would take our would-be Exterminators to convice us that we cannot carry on being Gibraltarian.

This is such a monstrosity than we should call an Irish what's-name from that paper to solve it.

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